NPD Personality Styles: Amorous
This type of narcissist seeks power and influence over others through sexual games. “These persons have an indifferent conscience and an aloofness to truth and social responsibility that, if brought to their attention, elicits an attitude of nonchalant innocence . . . . They are skillful in enticing, bewitching, and tantalizing the needy and the naive.”1 However, since the pathological narcissistic personality cannot form emotional attachments with others, despite all the flirtation and seduction no truly intimate relationships are ever formed. One aspect of the sexual game that is of extreme importance to the amorous narcissist is the drive to repeatedly prove him or herself as a seducer and bedroom athlete. However, despite that gamesmanship involved in making another conquest, not surprisingly, the game and conquest seem to be of greater importance to the amorous narcissist than the duration or quality of the relationship itself, which is typically very brief. Lasting relationships pose a potential threat to the narcissist as the longer they are with anyone else, the more opportunities there are for their deceptions and lack of true attachment to be found out.
Millon observes that, “their sexual banter and seductive pursuits are merely empty maneuvers to overcome deeper feelings of inadequacy. Although they seem to desire the affections of a warm and intimate relationship, they typically feel restless and unsatisfied when they find it. Having won others over, they seem to need to continue their pursuit. It is the act of exhibitionistically being seductive, and hence gaining in narcissistic stature, that compels and must be pursued again and again. . . . Rather than apply their talents toward the goal of tangible achievements or genuine relationships, they will devote their energies to construct intricate lies, to cleverly exploit others, and to slyly contrive ways to extract from others what they believe is their due. Criticism and punishment are likely to prove of no avail and are quickly dismissed as the product of jealous inferiors.”2
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1Millon, 1998, p.92
2Millon, 1998, p.93